Disconnect to reconnect


The more you document your own life, the more you check in, you tweet, the more you post photos of what you did last night, the more you do all of this stuff, or even in my case, the more you listen for little lines of dialogue that can make their way into stories, the more you photograph moments, in a way, the more you start to step out of those moments. And if you do that too much, you become a spectator to your own life. -Jonathan Harris

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You are not entitled

We are not entitled to anyone’s love.
We are not entitled to anyone’s friendship.
We are not entitled to anyone’s professionalism, courtesy, consideration or admiration.
We are not even entitled to life.
Receive it all in gratitude.
Tomorrow is not promised.


Every time I visit Jada Pinkett-Smith’s page on Facebook, I receive a message crafted just for me. Jada has a way of using her introspective thoughts to connect with all of her readers.  I love and admire the caution she takes in analyzing every experience, gaining peace along the way.

I read the post above and thought, wow, you’re so right, Jada. Although I knew the information already, it just hit a little closer to home for me.

How often do we feel like people owe us everything? We feel like our family owe us love; our friends owe us time; our colleagues owe us respect; our partners owe us love and admiration. In an ideal world, we would get everything we wanted. But in this life, you can’t control any of it, only your response to it.

So, you can choose to be upset when people don’t acknowledge you, when situations don’t go your way, or when someone doesn’t love you the way you want to be loved. Or…you can accept that you’re not entitled to any of those things. That way, when you do unexpectedly receive whatever it is that you desire, you will be grateful for it.

Let go of the need to control the outcome and start appreciating what is in front of you right now.

Happy Monday.

miss lucy

Justice for trayvon

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Saturday night, we watched as the verdict of “not guilty” flashed across our TV screens. We experienced, to a certain degree, the sadness that Tracy Martin and Sybrina Fulton felt as the murderer of their son was set free. Actually, we can’t really imagine what they must have felt. What they just experienced was the death of their son for the second time. His entire existence made a mockery of in just a few of weeks of deliberation.

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Style Spotlight: Jana-Lynn Louis

This young lady is one of my favorite favorite favorite people ever. If it doesn’t “match” or make sense, she’ll try wearing it, and wear it well. There are just some people who transcend fashion rules and trends to create their own style lane. That is Jana. I completely admire her for it. If you don’t completely love her after reading this, just remember that she used the word juxtaposition here. Check it.


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Style Spotlight: Chioma Anosike

I’ve interacted with this beautiful young lady via Instagram for a while now and I’ve fallen for her simple yet creative style. The sign of a truly stylish person is being able to reuse items from your closet over and over again and still being able to make it look brand new. That’s what Chioma of C’s Evolution of Style does in a colorful fashion. Her style in a sentence to me says, “Yup, I may have gotten that from Target but you’ll never wear it exactly like me.” And I love that!

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Weekend at a glance: it feels like summer #70


Despite working overtime most of the weekend, I had a pleasant Saturday with friends. I finally got my butt up early and off to church service at Berean Seventh Day Adventist Church. Although I’m indifferent to a lot of the traditions in the SDA faith, I do miss the worship. The SDA hymnal really is a cut above the rest. But more than the music, I want to leave church feeling as though I learned something. And Pastor Russell always does that. As infrequently as I visit, each time I go, I leave with a great message tailored just for me.

This past Sabbath, he started a new series called Simple Church – Part 1: Community.  Of course I would love that, lol.

There’s always this quest…to be in community with people. We all have a need to know people fully…but we all have a need to be known by other people.

We’re so into “us” that we don’t understand community.

How is it that you can be surrounded by so many people and still feel lonely? He begins by saying he doesn’t have a solution to this problem.

Wait…….I just found the ENTIRE sermon on YouTube. Will you look at God already?! Yeessh. Technology is amazing. Let me know if you see me in the third row, center 😀

Anyway, I won’t try to summarize what he said. I love how Russell preaches and teaches the Word. Just watch.

After church, I met up with a few friends at Paschal’s for Rashad’s birthday celebration. No shade to Drake but new friends are equally as good as old friends. Old or new, I enjoy being around good energy, genuine and kind-hearted people. And of course, a Sabbath isn’t complete without a photo-op. At least not with these guys, lol. We had a blast.


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Style Spotlight: Bessie Akuba Winn-Afeku

I’ve met many people in my life but I never thought I would come across meaningful people through social media. I would read this particular woman’s tweets and think, man, she sounds like someone I could hang out with in real life. And we did finally have lunch. Sure enough, her personality online matched her real life persona. I love when that happens. Fast forward to this present moment and she’s still someone who inspires me. She knows what she wants, she’s aware of her intrinsic power and then she makes magical things happen.

Glad to have this creative lady in my life.


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Style Spotlight: Verbatum Jones

Ever met someone that you just knew would be in your life a little while longer than the rest? Like, you guys just connect on so many different levels? The energy is just right.  I’m pretty sure I met this guy on Twitter through mutual friends. We met (in real life) the Summer of 2011 and it was just an immediate connection. I’ve never met a soul as cool and comfortable as his. Meet my first male feature and ever so humble friend, Verb.


Image by Daniel Wooden.

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