Self-awareness is a lost art

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“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” 
―  C. G. Jung

I’ve been in a very introspective mood lately. Really, I always am. Always over-thinking, always over-analyzing and always observing. It’s exhausting! Despite all of that, I had a pretty good weekend. Spent time with friends: eating, drinking and laughing until we couldn’t stand it. And I loved it. But there’s always that moment after it’s all over when you retreat back to your thoughts. Back to reality.

Yesterday after work, I went home, took a nap and woke up restless. The sun was out being annoyingly bright. I got up with the intent to do yoga but I always forget the moves so there’s that. Then I decided to take a walk but I didn’t feel like being chased by a dog. So, I went to the small airport by my house just to watch the sunset and ruminate over different aspects of life.

My notes:

  • Make yourself a priority. No one can take care of you better than you can.
  • Remember that you are human and learn to be easy on yourself. A good friend of mine told me that recently. I didn’t even realize how hard I was being on myself.
  • Call yourself out on your own bullshit. Although there are times when we should unwind, you will not reach your destination in life if you choose a life of being small. You must accomplish great things (according to you) in order to be great. It’s all up to you.
  • Take time to enjoy the stillness in life. It’s very hard for me to keep still and do nothing. I love to work. I love to be busy doing projects. Sitting down to watch TV for more than two hours is an utter waste of time to me. But we need those moments of nothingness to relax and recharge our minds. Read, listen, observe.
  • The road to success is paved with loneliness. Even when all around you appears despondent, remain vigilant and focused. Don’t give up.
  • If you love it, let it be free. We want people to love and care for us in the same manner that we show to them. We expect and crave so much. We feel like if someone doesn’t give us the love we want, we’re going to die. True love is the ability to let go and let be. “You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free.”
  • Know when it’s time to throw in the towel and start over. Some things aren’t worth your energy.
  • Take time to figure it all out. There’s so many things vying for your attention. Tune it all out in order to receive clarity.
  • You don’t owe anyone an explanation. A simple answer will do. You do not need external justifications for what you do with your plans or your life.
  • I’ll never be the perfect friend or perfect person. Ninety percent of the time, I will not call you. This is just something everyone has to accept about me, lol. I’m distant and have severe trust issues. IT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. But I will always do my best to be 1000% genuine with you.
  • Just do it. Sitting on an idea will cause you to lose the passion you once had about bringing it to fruition.
  • Don’t be afraid to say how you feel, express how you feel. What you allow, will continue.
  • You are not a victim. You have circumstances, yes. But you always have a choice in making a change. It may not be the one you want to make but you still have to be responsible for it.
  • Save room for love. I love love, but I don’t necessarily believe that it’s attainable romantically for me. I look for it in everything around me and I’m temporarily satisfied. One day, someone will change my mind 🙂
  • Be your own cheerleader. As someone who is not easily motivated by others, I have to tell myself positive things or else it’s a wrap. It’s not easy but you must believe that good things will come to you.
  • Don’t be afraid to delve into the unknown. As a Taurus, I’m a planner. I research every single move I want to make. Risks are not something we take. But in life, nothing goes as planned. Yes, you can try to avoid a mistake but what will you have learned? Step out on the ledge and jump. Failure is proof of effort.
  • Acceptance is the only way. You’ll create so much internal turmoil and heartbreak by trying to mold things into your ideal fit.
  • Never lose your sense of curiosity. You are here to live, to love, to explore. Question everything.

Everyday I am thankful to God for my introspective thoughts. Although many times, I don’t recognize them as growth but they are. I’m unleashing the limits to what I think are possible. I’m making myself uncomfortable. I’m preparing myself for a leap. All of this thinking while staring out at the four airplanes by my house. Woo.

miss lucy

4 thoughts on “Self-awareness is a lost art

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